It was an odd feeling to be at the funeral of someone I had barely known and yet heard so much about. The traditions and funeral protocols here are different to many of the funerals I have been to. The service for Tommy's mum was held at his sisters home and performed by someone who had known the family for a long time. Because of that it seemed a very personal service and most people agreed it was very fitting.

After the service the coffin is lifted and carried out with immediate family, sons, brothers, taking turns to carry the coffin and those wanting to show their respect walking behind. I joined in alongside Tommy's aunt and sister but discovered later that traditionally women do not take part in the walk. Whether it is because times are changing or whether it is a sign of the mettle of the women in this family, I do not know, but there were a good few walking behind us.

After the burial and prayers at the cemetary there were cups of tea and sandwiches back at the house. It was then that family connections are remembered. Photos materialise from handbags and pockets and along with them stories and memories of weddings, christenings, picnics, parties, holidays, mischievous antics and parties. It was an amazing experience, these people truly do have the gift of storytelling.

I have to say I feel honoured to have been a part of this and to have been made to feel so accepted despite being a complete stranger to most people there.